one thing therapy has done for me that's been great, and is also, probably, just a byproduct of becoming older and wiser, is helped me to realize that i can't control everything. i'm what i guess would be considered somewhat of a control freak, and if something happens in my life that i can't either subltely (sp?) or overtly manipulate to go the way that i want it to, i panic.
it's felt really good, actually, to be able to let go of that mindset. i've come to realize that it does virtually nothing but cause frustration and anxiety. i also have a horrible tendency to compare myself to other people and feel like i come up very short, not really keeping in mind that perhaps my time just hasn't come yet. it seems like wedding fever really is in the air (sigh), with no less than 5 couples that i'm fairly close to (some more than others) getting married in the next year. i'm very glad for all of them, because they all deserve it, but it also makes me realize how much my life is changing. i guess i've been braced for it for awhile, but i didn't expect it all to happen quite so suddenly. it's a wistful, bittersweet feeling, and i honestly think i would feel that way even if i were the one getting married. and here i am going back to school in january to get my bachelors degree. in some ways i feel like i'm degressing (is that even a word?), but i know i'm not. it's good for me, and something i really need to do, and i couldn't be more thrilled about my latest decision to pursue a degree in psychology and then a masters in counseling. as karen put it the other night, "all we ever do is sit around and analyze ourselves, and each other, and our relationships, so it makes sense you would decide you want to do that as a career." or something along those lines. well said, karen.
anyway, the hurricane did not hit us today as predicted; in fact, it did the opposite of hit us. it was about a hundred degrees and sunny as hell. lucky for all the ACL-goers, i guess, but i have to admit i was a bit disappointed. i was really hoping to get pounded by a big one. no pun intended. so collier and i went shopping, and i found what might be one of the greatest shirts ever created at Blue Velvet, for only $16. it's a red and blue plaid western-style shirt with gold, shiny thread and pearl snap buttons. it's beautiful and it actually fits me. it's very exciting. and luckily i found it, b/c my heart was broken at Service Menswear by a shirt that was 50% off and might be the greatest shirt i've ever seen, but they only had it in medium. it was brown with yellow pin-stripes, but then had a white collar with sort of water-color-looking yellow birds on it. it sounds stupid, but i would be the hottest guy in the world if i only owned it. story of my life.
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